Undecided or indecisive?

It is helpful to consider whether we are undecided or indecisive.

Undecided is situational, and indecisive is personal.

Being undecided is a normal step along the way. It means we need more information before we make any decision. The assumption is that if we have necessary pieces of information, we will be able to make a decision.

We need more information about our options, more information about our personality, and more information about what criteria to base our decision on.

Being undecided is okay. It means we are generally able to make good decisions in other areas. Given enough time or resources, we will be able to do all things well.

Being indecisive is different. It indicates that we have trouble making decisions in many areas. It indicates that we need to struggle to make a decision in spite of having a lot of information.

The cause to be indecisive is because we see too many options and we see how each one can effect every little thing and we have a hard time letting go of things.

The cause to be indecisive is also because we don't know ourselves very well. We carry the internal conflict on what we want versus what others want from us. We don't know exactly what we want to choose.

The cause to be indecisive is also because we don't know how to make a right decision.

Below are some reasons why we are so indecisive:

• We are fearful of making mistakes.
• We have struggled and failed to make the right decisions in many areas of our life.
• We have developed a habit to postpone decision making, hoping that others can and will decide for us.
• We change our mind frequently.
• We get very anxious about making decision.
• We feel unready to face the consequences of our decisions.
• We are worried about what others may think of our decisions.
• We feel very uncertain despite having all the information we need to make a decision.
• We are worried that our decision will be a wrong one.

Some of us cannot even make the smallest decisions. They cannot decide on what to eat, where to go or what to do. They always have to look to others for help.

They leave it to others to make decisions. They don’t dare and don't want to take responsibility for anything that happens. They would rather blame it on others or on fate.

Maybe the best way to stop being indecisive is simply to force ourselves to make a choice.

If it so happens that we made a stupid decision, so be it, after all a lesson is learned.

The point for us is that we must learn to be decisive.

Or let us put it in writing before we decide what to do. Make a short list of the pros and cons and then go ahead with our decision.

Let us start small, like planning a meal or what clothes to wear. Then work our way up to more important things.

To start, limit ourselves to a maximum of five minutes of internal debate and then say "I want that one." Go for it and do it.

Breakdown our options and trust our past decisions, which have helped us along the way.

Let us be confident to carry out and stick to our decision.

Are we undecided or indecisive?

If it is a trivial one, like what food are we hungry for, we don't have to take that long to decide.

If it is a life altering decision, we have to be very indecisive, because we want to make sure that we are ready for this change. We have to take time to decide so as not to regret it at a later date. We have to very carefully evaluating our options. We must not let anyone rush us into anything or influence us too greatly. For at the end of the day, it is our decision and we are the one who is going to enjoy or suffer the consequences.

Anyway, it is good to be undecided once in a while because it help to make better decisions.

But indecisiveness will definitely get us nowhere.